Here's an except from my Mum's eulogy, which sums up her parking skills:
In the late 1970’s my Mum decided to learn to drive, and embarked on an odyssey that continued for years over hundreds of lessons, multiple instructors and numerous (some say four, some say seven) driving tests. Mum was simply the most nervous driver imaginable, but eventually passed her test.
My dad had bought a brand new Vauxhall Viva back in 1973 and it was his pride and joy. He lavished endless care and attention on it as and Mum was petrified of crashing it. Our family home was on a blind bend and the council had recently installed a large chevron sign outside the front gate. One school holiday, Mum decided to take my brother and I to the local swimming pool, which although only ten miles away was (for her) an epic driving adventure.
However, upon reversing the car out of the driveway, she – by a method still unfathomable to all involved – managed to neatly slot the edge of the chevron sign between the driver’s door and the bodywork. The car was stuck fast! Mum went for help from Ray, the owner of the garage next door and before long a team of six mechanics managed to lift the car sideways off the sign. Ray's comment “Give it a polish with Mr Sheen, your old man will never know”.
Oh Shane, this is so great. What a story. I think your mum sounds like she was wonderful. It reminded me that I once drove into a bookcase and somehow got the car wedged into it so that I couldn't pull away without it coming with me. (It was in a garage although I'm aware that this in no way explains this.) Kindred spirits.
I once panicked while driving down a narrow road with parked cars either side and confronted by a lorry. I took a turning down an alleyway/driveway on impulse and then tried to turn around but got stuck like Austin Powers. I ended up going to a newsagents and asking the shopkeeper to help me but I think his wife thought I was trying to set up some sort of robbery crime so I left my bag with my purse etc there as collateral (me offering to show how much of a non criminal I am). He came out and got me back on the main road no problem. I wonder what they thought of it all!
This is so relatable. I want to live in a community with all you terrible parkers. We'll make all spaces massive and parallel parking won't exist. We won't judge as folk have to manoeuvre and correct multiple times. We won't get frazzled if folk watch. This will be our nirvana. Where scratches will be treated as medals, and dents will be marks of honour!!!!
(Alternatively we could all just improve this fairly standard life skill, but that seems ridiculous)
My husband is the terrible parker in our household and will drive further away to visit supermarkets that have less cramped spaces just to park more easily. We have sensors but I think he tunes them out so won’t notice until he hears the ‘dunk’ of hitting some inanimate object. My advice would be get a small car with parking sensors and a reversing camera. Small cars are much more forgiving in tight spaces as bigger cars are genuinely wider. Some parking cameras even do a top down view where you can see the parking bay lines! It’s marvellous.
That being said I’ve been known to abandon parking if people are watching me! 👀 I can’t stand the pressure!
I'm also rubbish at parking, is it genetic?? I once waited in a freezing cold car for over 15 mins making myself late for yoga because I couldn't face trying to park yet again. There were people standing by their car chatting and I knew once they had driven away I'd be able to park easily as there'd be a 2 car space. The worst thing was one of those people was my old neighbour.
I had to ask a stranger to park the rental car I had recklessly hired whilst on holiday - it wasn’t even parallel parking, just into a parking space that for some reason I couldn’t manage!! He did look a bit bemused…. It is much easier if you have those parking cameras though - makes it seem more like a computer game and therefore a whole lot less stressful!!
Every single time, without exception, when I get out of my car I am ashamed at how badly it's parked. I learnt to drive before parallel parking was part of the test so any space that needs that is a no. If the space isn't big enough to go in forwards I just can't park. My neighbours laugh at me. My husband sometimes just quietly goes out and straightens the car because he is embarrassed about having it outside the house. It doesn't matter if there's no other cars around. Often it's even worse then.
I am also a terrible parker. Any time that I have managed to parallel park with no need for multiple, tedious corrections has been pure luck. Maybe 1 in 100 odds? I even got my car stuck on one of the cement blocks that keep you driving too forward. Poor spatial awareness is what I’ve heard too but how can there also be no ability to ever improve?
I once got hooked on the car next to me when reversing out of a space, I couldn't get free despite going forwards and backwards a few times. I actually lifted the car up, realising at that moment that the father and teenage son were both in their car, looking concerned I was actually in charge of a vehicle
I’m a good Parker, can reverse in , parallel park with ease. However, for 16 years I worked at our local market and had to tow a caravan- I could not back it, my brain just double flipped what I was supposed to do . So, for 16 years I arrived an hour early so I could drive straight in to my spit and left an hour late so I could drive straight out! Only ever went forwards!
Here's an except from my Mum's eulogy, which sums up her parking skills:
In the late 1970’s my Mum decided to learn to drive, and embarked on an odyssey that continued for years over hundreds of lessons, multiple instructors and numerous (some say four, some say seven) driving tests. Mum was simply the most nervous driver imaginable, but eventually passed her test.
My dad had bought a brand new Vauxhall Viva back in 1973 and it was his pride and joy. He lavished endless care and attention on it as and Mum was petrified of crashing it. Our family home was on a blind bend and the council had recently installed a large chevron sign outside the front gate. One school holiday, Mum decided to take my brother and I to the local swimming pool, which although only ten miles away was (for her) an epic driving adventure.
However, upon reversing the car out of the driveway, she – by a method still unfathomable to all involved – managed to neatly slot the edge of the chevron sign between the driver’s door and the bodywork. The car was stuck fast! Mum went for help from Ray, the owner of the garage next door and before long a team of six mechanics managed to lift the car sideways off the sign. Ray's comment “Give it a polish with Mr Sheen, your old man will never know”.
Oh Shane, this is so great. What a story. I think your mum sounds like she was wonderful. It reminded me that I once drove into a bookcase and somehow got the car wedged into it so that I couldn't pull away without it coming with me. (It was in a garage although I'm aware that this in no way explains this.) Kindred spirits.
I once panicked while driving down a narrow road with parked cars either side and confronted by a lorry. I took a turning down an alleyway/driveway on impulse and then tried to turn around but got stuck like Austin Powers. I ended up going to a newsagents and asking the shopkeeper to help me but I think his wife thought I was trying to set up some sort of robbery crime so I left my bag with my purse etc there as collateral (me offering to show how much of a non criminal I am). He came out and got me back on the main road no problem. I wonder what they thought of it all!
I would like to see a film of this which I would watch and relate so hard throughout.
This is so relatable. I want to live in a community with all you terrible parkers. We'll make all spaces massive and parallel parking won't exist. We won't judge as folk have to manoeuvre and correct multiple times. We won't get frazzled if folk watch. This will be our nirvana. Where scratches will be treated as medals, and dents will be marks of honour!!!!
(Alternatively we could all just improve this fairly standard life skill, but that seems ridiculous)
Yes! Love this! It’s nirvana.
My husband is the terrible parker in our household and will drive further away to visit supermarkets that have less cramped spaces just to park more easily. We have sensors but I think he tunes them out so won’t notice until he hears the ‘dunk’ of hitting some inanimate object. My advice would be get a small car with parking sensors and a reversing camera. Small cars are much more forgiving in tight spaces as bigger cars are genuinely wider. Some parking cameras even do a top down view where you can see the parking bay lines! It’s marvellous.
That being said I’ve been known to abandon parking if people are watching me! 👀 I can’t stand the pressure!
The pressure is horrendous! I will do a lot to avoid it.
I'm also rubbish at parking, is it genetic?? I once waited in a freezing cold car for over 15 mins making myself late for yoga because I couldn't face trying to park yet again. There were people standing by their car chatting and I knew once they had driven away I'd be able to park easily as there'd be a 2 car space. The worst thing was one of those people was my old neighbour.
😂 It must be genetic.
I had to ask a stranger to park the rental car I had recklessly hired whilst on holiday - it wasn’t even parallel parking, just into a parking space that for some reason I couldn’t manage!! He did look a bit bemused…. It is much easier if you have those parking cameras though - makes it seem more like a computer game and therefore a whole lot less stressful!!
‘Recklessly hired’ 😂 This describes all my car rentals.
Maybe parking cameras are the answer.
Every single time, without exception, when I get out of my car I am ashamed at how badly it's parked. I learnt to drive before parallel parking was part of the test so any space that needs that is a no. If the space isn't big enough to go in forwards I just can't park. My neighbours laugh at me. My husband sometimes just quietly goes out and straightens the car because he is embarrassed about having it outside the house. It doesn't matter if there's no other cars around. Often it's even worse then.
😂 That’s so funny that your husband does that.
I am also a terrible parker. Any time that I have managed to parallel park with no need for multiple, tedious corrections has been pure luck. Maybe 1 in 100 odds? I even got my car stuck on one of the cement blocks that keep you driving too forward. Poor spatial awareness is what I’ve heard too but how can there also be no ability to ever improve?
I'm seriously considering going to parking school if it exists.
I once got hooked on the car next to me when reversing out of a space, I couldn't get free despite going forwards and backwards a few times. I actually lifted the car up, realising at that moment that the father and teenage son were both in their car, looking concerned I was actually in charge of a vehicle
😂 I think you’ll qualify for the bad parker’s permit.
I’m a good Parker, can reverse in , parallel park with ease. However, for 16 years I worked at our local market and had to tow a caravan- I could not back it, my brain just double flipped what I was supposed to do . So, for 16 years I arrived an hour early so I could drive straight in to my spit and left an hour late so I could drive straight out! Only ever went forwards!
This is incredible dedication to an easy park and I wholly respect it.